Dream: Command Center COMPLETE!

As silly as it sounds, I have been dreaming about a 'Command Center' in my home since the first time I came across the idea on Pinterest, two years ago.  Throughout the last few weeks of getting both boys going in their school year, and I. trying to organize the completion of nursing school with acquisition of a new job, there have been a LOT of papers flying around this house!  Every day the boys come home there are about four or five pieces of information I need to digest, artwork to smile at, things to sign and dates of upcoming events that I can not ignore. Not to mention that backpacks are thrown about randomly in the house (drives me *#BONKERS#*)!

I am a relatively organized person and when I began to understand the volume of 'incoming' I knew I needed to address it all PRONTO!  I had four different areas of my house that were frequently visited by me or the boys on a daily basis and I wanted to have ONE location where it all came together.... Hence, the Command Center. 

This is what a regular week of papers looked like in my home after searching through it one or five times to find 'that one paper,' I knew had a date for the 'thing,' with the phone number on it....




I needed to find a system in which I could easily drop information and such (after I made a serious consideration to 'File 13' initially it or not).  I also wanted to have my regular incoming mail and receipts (I save them for two weeks usually and then shred).  As I had my incoming mail and receipts holder on my fridge, I also brought that into the Command Center.  Here is the simple filing system I developed for all three of us in the household; mine has 'Random, Upcoming and To-Be Filed. 

When I am on the phone with someone or am coordinating any of our schedules I need to be able to grab anything in regards to all three of us in a quick moment.  This is hopefully going to save me from looking totally dis-shelved during communications.  For those who do not know the joys of having a household split 50/50 with children, it is a balancing act between not only 'the ex' but the boy's friends, school/daycare/bus drivers, extra-curriculars, grandparents wanting to visit and special activities. 

As the boys have been getting older, I have asked more of them around the house.  Nathaniel is very happy as of late to help get Boomer his dog food on a regular basis.  Both of the boys like to race each other either getting dressed or getting into their PJ's.  I have figured out that the best way to encourage this is to have them participate in a 'chore chart.'  The boys love to grab their step-stool and pick out three goals for their week.  They like to fill up as many days as possible as they know they can score an allowance (50 cents) when they fill up their week on all days with mommy.  (If I give it all in pennies they think they are millionaires!)  So this chart needed to make it into the Command Center as it is addressed frequently.

 

There were many ideas I had to implement into this Command Center but the most important was to have space for jotting a quick note, my big planner calendar, a clock, a weekly menu (when I get a free second I review my Google Calendar with pre-set meals and throw them on the board; saves me hours of contemplating).  I wanted to have a drop-zone for the boys backpacks when they came home and a place that I would be able to address the paperwork right away.  So.... THIS is what came to fruition in a quick two hours.  I am a VERY happy momma tonight and may or may not have sat and stared at it for 30 minutes as one of my dreams came true!  

Before

After

July 1st??? How did that happen?!

With a crazy amount of disbelief that it is July 1st, I begin this post.  It has been quite a while since I have filled you in on the Hopes, Wishes and Dreams that are playing out on a daily basis.  Let me do my best to catch you up in a condensed version that won't bore you to pieces. 

The last six months have been focused 100% on getting through my nursing program.  I have learned a ton, know that this is the path I am destined for and can not be happier to say that I am ALMOST finished!  When working the other night in the ER, one of my co-workers asked how much longer I have until I graduate...."12 Weeks," was my response.  As soon as I said it, I took a quick inhale as I felt that there was no way that was all that was left.  I remember my mother saying to me at the beginning of last year, "This is just a snapshot of your life, Jacki.  It is temporary and it will be done before you know it."  I knew she would be correct in her assessment and at times I did need to remind myself of those statements to get me through the discouraging days.  More than anything I am excited to give all of that 100% focus back to my boys.  They SO deserve it!

Really???   Twelve weeks from now?  Are you sure?

Between working in the ER, tutoring students (as my second 'job'), completing seven courses and maintaining a 'B average' throughout, completing three clinical requirements for class, getting Carson to completion of speech therapy, going through the legal process to solidify 50/50 placement of the boys, maintaining the home and simply getting the laundry done on a weekly basis; I am quite exhausted.  Being able to complete all of this gives me incentive to push out these last 11 weeks of class and preceptor-ship as a student nurse and walk across that stage in confidence.  As I prepare for the NCLEX-RN, I fear not passing.  I know I have the knowledge necessary to pass, I simply need to focus, be positive in my answers and show the State that I know what I am doing and I will have the minimum competency standards to prevent harm to any of my patients.   

The boys are growing so fast!  Nathaniel is currently in summer school and will be starting Kindergarten in the fall.  He is interested in baseball in the backyard, riding his bike down the sidewalk (still has training wheels), writing out letters in his name and catching some 'big whoppers' whenever he can. 

Carson has transformed into a "Skylander Loving" boy (I still don't understand what they are all about).  He enjoys playing with anything with wheels (still), loves dumping out ALL the Lego pieces onto the living room floor and leaving them.  He has also become a very good buddy to Boomer (our dog).  He is affectionate and very silly and will for certain be the social butterfly of our home. 

I love both of them so much!  The weather has improved to the point where we can go to the park almost every night when they are home with me.  Most recently we have gotten an ice cream cone and driven through the zoo in the evening hours, which they both enjoy very much. 

My Hopes:  I hope to coast through this last quarter of school with confidence, while still building my knowledge and skills for my graduation goal.

My Wishes:  The boys and I can enjoy these beautiful summer months and remain healthy throughout.

My Dreams:  Walk across that stage in 12 weeks to receive my Associate Degree in Nursing.  To pass the NCLEX-RN on my first attempt.  Acquire a full-time nursing position locally within two months of graduation.  My focus will be building a life for me and the boys that give them the opportunities to travel, learn in knowledge and God, and to guide them in becoming kind, polite and well-mannered, compassionate little men who have no qualms in reaching out to others who need a helping hand. 

Happy New Year

A new year.  A new day. 

Nursing school resumes full-time in three days.  We had homework over our winter break.  HOMEWORK!  Who does that?! 

The holidays were amazing and fantastic.  The house is de-Christma-fied.  The boys had SO much fun looking for Elf on the Shelf this year, opening presents and listening to all the great Christmas stories and movies.

We are currently in one of the coldest of cold snaps to hit the Midwest in a couple decades.  NOT loving it.  I despise cold.  Why do I live in Wisconsin?  Because my family and friends are here and I would take a few weeks of whining about the cold rather than living in an earthquake, hurricane, Nor'easter, tornado zone. 

I got another job as a tutor at my college.  That should be thrilling along with the 17 credits this quarter.  Only 80 days until I am through the other side.  I am pretty nervous about this one coming up.  SIX girls I believe have to retake the Clinical Rotation site that we are going to! That means they didn't PASS! (And they don't have that big of a class).  We shall see.  I just have to make it through one day at a time. 

Finished reading "The Book Thief," this morning.  I highly recommend it.  I read three novels over my break.  Feeling very relaxed.  I now realize why I enjoy going into those 'worlds.'  It just makes reality seem so much more 'light.'   Wanting to get motivated to workout (30 minutes a day of walking would be enough at this juncture)...  But I just am unable to muster up the gumption. Time will open up in the next 365 for me... I pray.  I hope to focus MUCH MORE on my physical and mental health wellness once I pass nursing school and am shooting for a passing N-CLEX!    Catch ya on the flip side!

Christmas Through the Years

Babble to Avoid Books

When I saw this picture, I had to chuckle.  This is EXACTLY how I feel today!  AND...I have most of those books in front of her and know how incredibly intimidating 'the pile' is to the right of this computer.  It IS that tall (but not nearly as colorful).

I started my next quarter and I am SO overwhelmed at the moment, that I am somewhat paralyzed.  There are small victories and little joys in regards to school (I got a passing grade on my first Med-Surg Exam).  Yet, I find myself slipping into a very uncomfortable feeling.  I could compare it to an elephant sitting on my back, the fur (if I had any) on my back being rubbed the wrong way, or having the feeling that something isn't quite finished,....EVER.  I go to bed with this feeling and wake up with the feeling.  I believe that part of nursing school is learning how to be comfortable with being uncomfortable.  There is SO much material (there is no possible way any human being could read this in the amount of time we have assigned and be able to complete all of our other assignments and study for exams).  It's just not a realistic goal to have ALL of my homework done.  I now know that I can only do so much before I am beating my head against the wall.  Today was the day when I finally came to grips with how I will study for my courses this quarter.  I believe that my first exam(s) today gave me the idea of how to study from this point forward.  I feel much more at peace in knowing that I can accomplish the things required of me and then 'go back over' information after the fact.  I have MANY friends who are nurses, and I am in awe of them right now.  I believe it is somewhat of a right of passage to have this much stress on your shoulders on a nursing school.  I don't want to be one of those students that 'drops' because of the pressure. I am going to plow through this.  My dyshidrotic eczema on my hands is flaring yesterday and today because the stress is physiological in me.  I understand I don't handle stress well but knowing what I CAN manage will make all the difference as I move forward in this quarter.  Most of my classmates are feeling similar in regards to overwhelming study requests...I am so thankful I am not alone in this.

My desk area upstairs is just perfect to get my homework and ATI Modules completed.  I spend a minimum of six hours each day up here.  If I had to run around the house and sit in uncomfortable places and not have enough light or paper or things nearby, it would just add to the stress level.    The roof on my house is currently being replaced as well.  The chimney came down this evening and there are currently about 150 broken up and chiseled bricks in the middle of my backyard...they will be making a trip to the dump tomorrow.   My parents are being wonderful in helping me out with picking up and dropping boys when I have my clinicals currently.  I couldn't do this without them.  Having them here once a week is also SO wonderful so I can vent and share some of this misery.    Most importantly, they are my cheerleaders and I couldn't be doing this without them. Having my laundry done and some meals made and providing help with the boys bedtime routine is incredibly invaluable when it's 'just me.'  I am blessed.  When looking at some of my classmates, I wonder how they are juggling it all.  Some of them just had a new baby, some drive from 2+ hours away!  Some don't have any prior medical knowledge.  In those situations, I know I would personally crack under the pressure.  My world is currently chaos, but I hope it simmers down eight weeks from now.

Good news:  I made the Honor's List for the summer quarter!

Many Things

So much has happened over the last few weeks in regards to 'moving forward.'

Not only have I secured a job in the Emergency Room at the hospital, resigned from my current position in Dermatology.  But I have started an online College Algebra course (which is not easy, I may add).  I am almost completed with my three scheduled courses for Quarter 1.  I resigned from one college and plan to start the same course at the college I am currently attending (so everything will be simplified and schedules will not conflict).  My Nathaniel started Pre-Kindergarten (and he is doing awesome) and Carson has started speech therapy for improvement on his 'S's" and "other letter enunciation's." 

I have had a heck of a migraine for the past two days so I have been out of commission and feel like I am falling behind on schoolwork; even though I am still pretty well ahead, but it's 'behind' for me. I am planning on getting my roof worked on in the next two months.  Digging deep into the pockets for that one is not a comfortable feeling for me as I don't have much of a cushion to begin with.  However, I fear that if I don't get the roof done prior to this winter, spring cleaning may come a little sooner than expected in my attic; and I really don't/won't have time for that.  I am totally overwhelmed at the prospect of having 21 credits in just a few weeks.  With the help of my parents, I know that everything will turn out fine, but the reality of it coming up just terrifies me.  There will be no spare time for much.   21 credits equals 63 hours of just studying and then taking into account that I will be travelling 2 hours every day.  Working during that week and also being in classes for 23 hours of the week...and somehow in there find time for housework, loving my babies and sleep.   Good times.   It will nonetheless be a stressful quarter.   Anyone up for a party on December 20th??!    See ya then!

Does Somebody Have a Case of the Mondays?

My simple answer to the question is, "No.  I don't have time to have a 'case of the Mondays."  I am too darn busy to even know what day it is lately!  The past few weeks I have been rolling with the flow as far as homework goes and squeaking by with homework on the weekends in which the boys are home with me.  The weekends they are elsewhere I can give it 110% and plow through a lot of the next weeks readings ahead of time (which will save my toosh in the future, I am sure). I really enjoy the feeling I get when completing things ahead of time.  I do feel as though I am being successful in getting schoolwork accomplished and I am giving about 96% effort into each assignment, but there is still that small percentage that makes me doubt if I am giving it everything I've got.   Maybe it's the simple fact that every few months, I am transitioning (by life transitions) with life experiences.  Over the last year SO much has happened as far as getting my 'next step' moving forward. The boys switched back to their old daycare. I became a CNA.  I have already completed nine college level courses within the last eight months (all A's; thank you very much!), got accepted into nursing school, started the nursing program, I have two more classes I am starting in the next two weeks in addition to the three I am already in. And I have three more classes which I am starting the beginning of October (while the other three courses wrap up).  It's chaos.  Organized chaos.  I ask myself some days if I am on the verge of 'burnout.'  How could I be, I ask myself?  I just started!  To ground myself I recognize that I knew that it would be like this.  That chaos would indeed come my way.  That I could no longer focus on friends, house and relationships 110%. It's knowing that this 'snapshot' of my life will be quick. (as one of my instructors states).  I have to remember my main goal in becoming a nurse.

1)  I know I will be an excellent nurse and I am eager to get on 'the floor' and begin showing patients and families the compassion of nursing.

2) Showing my boys that it is never too late to chase a dream.  They will watch it become reality for me.  They may not understand it at their current ages, but as they grow into men, I pray that they will understand the value of education.

3) Providing for my boys and myself and to care for myself in a way I could never before, with confidence.

4)  Teaching my boys how to be a caregiver and portray kindness is key in life. 

I look forward to what the next couple of weeks will be dealing out for me.  I know it will be another challenge that I will undertake.  I do know that as I move forward in school, nothing will be as stressful as two years ago was for me; and for that, I will succeed many times over in this endeavor.

In two days I will have made it through to the halfway point of my 'first' quarter.  It has been amazing thus far.  LOTS of assignments and new expectations for assignments (APA Format--errrr! Discussion Board Posting etiquette and even learning how to change a Power Point).   Quite the ride!  I have met a whole lot of other ladies (and two gents) who are making my classes fun and worthwhile. I finished Sociology-- and got an "A" in that!  :-)

I am dedicated to getting more slim and fit as well as eating better.  So far in the past eight days I have lost eight pounds.  Pretty good if you ask me.   A lot has actually been going on around here in regards to beautifying the house, but I am too tired to talk about it now.  I hope to be back on here sooner than later to fill you in.  Peace out!

I'm Old(er)

An excellent day for reflection:  Birthdays.  I love birthdays, especially my own.  I usually make a huge deal of it; take off from work, go out to eat, buy myself a couple things to make me smile....  the basics.   Today, I maintained the routine; ate my bowl of Cheerios, went to work, came home and played with the kids, did some homework and to just recently, farted around on the Internet until I realized I need to update my B-L-O-G.

Summer Quarter for Rasmussen College began a little over a week ago.  As a brand new student to the school I have to gush about how impressed I am with all of the counselors, advisers, instructors and program managers at this point.  Through the entire admission process there they have been nothing but cordial, proactive and encouraging in getting all of my pre-program checklist catered to.  In the last week I have had quite the steep learning curve with having to adjust to APA Formatting of papers, how to navigate the online courses (SO different than Midstate Technical College), and get to know a few of the ladies (and two gentlemen) who are in my courses.  Coinciding with these courses I am still schooling with one course through Midstate.  That class will be complete in two weeks when I then get a one week break and then jump right back in at MSTC with an advanced course (that I already had the book for, and it's local, so I decided to stay right in town for that one).  A little stressful for all concerned (oh yeah, that's just me) but worth the confusion.  Come December (20th, to be exact) I will be done with the chaos and will be able to dedicate all of my energies just at Rasmussen.  Like I said, these folks over there are just priceless.  So priceless in fact, that I took the program manager (who has been 'hand-holding' me since April) flowers last week.  She was an amazing resource and informant through my starting date.  My goal is to be done with school by December 2014. I am already pooped out from papers and the idea of papers as I read through each syllabus and schedule for each course and my brain is just spinning from all the information I do not yet understand and will soon have to apply in order to pass the courses.  I know I will do fine, I just want to muddle through these next few months and feel like I accomplished something.   One of the most wonderful things they showed the new nursing students at orientation was a graduation video from the college.  I could 'see' myself with that cap, tassel and gown and that ADN in my hands.  I can't wait!  Don't get me started on the N-CLEX Exam; that is one thing I am not excited about.

Two AWESOME things happened on this wonderful day in history. Today Nathaniel sang me the ABC's and Carson ASKED to use the potty at dinner time and actually did it!  I was SO impressed with both boys. 

Speaking of cute:  I plan to be it, once again.  It's no joke, since I got married (and since I got preggo with N) I have totally not focused on my body or the shape it's getting into.  Think:  Oompa Loompa with longer legs.  Motivation has been lacking, but in knowing that I will have some time during the schooling process to take a walk here and there between classes or just being able to focus a little more on my routine because I HAVE to. I whine and whine about my image and energy level that is lacking and I never do anything about it.  It's time.   It's time to get my butt in shape and stop using excuses.  I have two beautiful little boys that I want to have energy to play with.  I have one son who asked very innocently the other day, "Momma?  Why is your tummy so big?"    UGH.   That was awful.  I joked it off with him but inside was just crumbling emotionally and beating myself up for letting myself 'go' that much.  What the heck is my problem?  I know I have been through a lot in the last few years, but there is always 'life' happening and it's my job to learn how to roll with it and still be healthy at the same time.  I want to be around for a long time to see my little babies grow into 20-somethings and get married and go to school themselves and start a career and begin a family (or whatever path their life may take).  I want to show them how to be healthy; not a bump on a log who is so addicted to sugar that she can't go a day without a diet soda (fake sugar) and/or some processed candy or frozen sweet treat.  YUCK!   I want to take them for bike rides, show them how to play kickball and throw Frisbees, battle badmitton and ice skate!   Today I googled "Motivation for a healthy lifestyle" or something of the like and I got my mental energy amped up for making 'it' happen.  No more sloppy stretchy pants.  No more sweets on a daily basis (Gosh, that's gonna suck).  No more sitting still when I know I could be doing a Wii Just Dance or some Turbo Jam--which I love doing.  I miss dancing.  I want to feel and look healthy.  So be it.  I will be a nurse AND cute...sooner, rather than later!

I'm going to be a Registered Nurse.

The journey begins (continues) today.